i wrote these a long time ago.

i wrote these a while ago. but i want them on my computer.

i wrote this one at nysssa.

ripping to resolution-

sheet after sheet of white paper

cutting

and snipping

why are the edges red?

and why hadn't i noticed when i bought it?

and why hadn't i noticed

when it started to infect me?

hadn't i seen that blood red shooting out my fingertips?

when my hair sprouted out that deep shade?

when my eyes cried out tears that stained my cheeks

my eyelashes became tinted and glossed

didnt i see them surrounding my eyes like a vail?

And i didnt even realize

when my skin became that red color

every time you touched it.

you left a handprint dark and strong and it didnt wash off

hadnt i seen?

And then came the point

when those sheets upon sheets of plain white

started tearing and ripping in front of my eyes.

exploding and bleeding all that red

it poured out on the floor

and splashed onto my feet.

my hands were covered

the vail of red over my eyes and all that red. i saw it.

finally i was colorblind no more.

i saw the red.

i saw that it had taken over.

i saw the soaked papers on the ground

all ripped and dead

not just the edges but the whole thing was drenched in color.

and then

for a while

i sat on the ground

with the drenched paper

and tried to fix it.

my hands just teared the paper more and let the red seep in deeper

so

i gave up

i stood up

and left all those papers and all that red.

just left it all there on that paper.