i want yr love, i dont wanna be friends!!

shits been goin down.

it was hell to sit there for 5 hours wanting to die.

i wish you knew.

but it was hell.

i wanted to leave.

i almost did but i didnt have an excuse.

ive felt sick since tuesday.

and now i cant tell people they are wrong.

i cant say they are lying.

and maybe i made a bad choice.

but i doubt it will happen again.

it wasnt the same and i didnt feel it.

i just thought about where id rather be.

but you have no room for me.

now im worried.

everythings going to be weird.

and i dont want it to be weird.

and i shouldnt have nodded my head.

i shouldve went home.

but whats done is done.

at least now i dont have to guess.

i will never stop wishing the same thing(s) over and over.

i wish i wanted something else.

but i had it and i didnt want it.

thats such a let down.

that it wont ever be the same.

hahahahah

my parents told me they are going to get me a car..

i got upset.

hah.

of corse i should be excited.

but i just feel so spoiled.

i dont want them to be doing things like that just to try to fill the hole where my family was.

its not fair.

but i guess after i thought about it i was happy.

i wont need them for anything anymore except money.

if it wasnt for dance...

dance is the reason im still here.

if i didnt need money from them to dance who the hell knows where i would be living or what i would be doing.

if travis was still here i wouldnt be in school.

thank god for dance.