Chatting on the phone can't take back those hours But I won't regret cause you can grow flowers from where dirt used to be

too much dancing?
too much stress?
its nothing, *baby*
put it to rest.
nothings impossible
i always do say.
but for this evening
we'll keep it at bay.
wait another week
and then ill be scared.
but we'll figure it out
it will all be repaired.
its really nothing
but an excuse to write.
which ive been needing
needing something to ignite.
i really dont like
this empty feeling
it feels insolent
like the wrong kind of healing.
so uninspired
and so trivial
and only the studio
feels convivial.
because i feel left out
in the simplest of phrasing.
and my hearts exaggeration
is truly amazing.
because it shouldn't matter
as much as it does.
and i shouldnt care
that it isnt how it was.
because i wasnt who i am
and how are you to blame?
i just wish i could shape up
cuz it really is a shame.
that i spent that night frowning
like a little angry mouse.
when i suppose i should treasure
the last moments in this house.
this house of sadness and cold as hell.
i really love to be here!
cant you tell?
with the tension in the air
as thick as butter
and box upon box
filled with the clutter.
pink stickers line my eyelids
while i spit up paint swatches
while the dogs sniff my hair
and my fish silently watches.
because they know it too
just as silly as it sounds.
they feel the weight
of three hearts on the ground.
so i get my blood money
and i go on my way.
as the calender marks off
all the last days.
and my mom is ready
as giddy as a horse.
and my dad stands by
filled with remorse.
in i sit here doing less,
less than i should
and sierra and nicole
try to make it sound good.
and you help with the decorating.
and you havent said a word.
and you understand
but keep the words unheard.
and you try to help
but you just make me mad
and i cant even speak to you
cuz i dont want to look sad.
and youve got yr own shit
so i wont interfere
and id love to talk to you
but your not even here
as you said you would be
but i saw right through
but dont worry about it
im not quite as blue
as i make myself seem
thats just the way it comes out
i go for a whisper
and end up with a shout.